I have been struggling at work. Man, I tell you.. the paperwork keeps on piling. I'm going downhill. I've been going late these past days too.. I dunno.. mebbe I'm just not in the mood to wake up early.

I can't wait to get a promotion. This is real honest. I have been working my ass out just to impress the bosses. I'm trying to be compliant in our SOPs.. yup all that jazz. But there are just times that I get chicken out.. I'm having second thoughts.

There's no particular reason why I'm feeling melodramatic today. Maybe its because of the traffic. You know that moments when you're caught between traffic jams and you just feel like shit. It is as if some absolute being is forcing all the crappiness of the world in your head.. like you want to stop feeling bad about the not so good things thats been happening in your life but your thoughts kept on shifting from one bad scenario to the worst ones? Like I could have been a bit sensitive of not bitch slapping someone today or not throwing an officemate off the bus?? Or maybe thinking real sensible before sending a mushy quote to someone that you sort of..LIKE.Or maybe... just maybe not acting like I'm some sort of a dead give away around him? At some point, I really hope I could have done things differently. And I feel crappy not acting responsibly about it.. as we speak.

Anyway, I shouldn't be really thinking about things that matter during IDLE moments of my day. I should be worrying about the promotion.

Yeah.. now thats sensible.