the interview

Is it true that you are leaving your previous post?

I have plans at the moment but they are somehow blurry. I'm job hunting, honestly, but the truth is I'm still undecided if I'm going to leave this call center for another one. The solid plan is to take the FSO next year because I feel that I'm really not supposed to be working in a call center. Yeah, people can tell that I have great leadership skills and the pay is somewhat great compared to other day jobs but the thing is.. my passion is with diplomacy and thats something that I should have pursued in the first place but instead I'm stuck here in the call center industry with lots of good looking friends and highly expensive gadgets that I can buy on my whim..but if you ask me if I'm satisfied? Hell no.

Your thoughts in passing the examination?

Geez, really.. I don't know if I can. But its not the freaking bar exam where in you study for the next eight years and all that jazz. I hope I can nail it, really but if not.. there's another year to take it anyway.

Did you get upset that you didn't get the OM post?

Yes and no. I was upset because a lot of people in the panel expected a lot from me and they were very dissapointed when I didn't land the job. But hell! I was the acting OM for almost a year and my rival is a training manager for god knows how long. Judging from the maturity level.. god, she's freakin 35 years old and I'm on my late twenties. Ponder that.

But will you apply again for the same post some time this year?

Yeah. There's no harm in trying. I really think that I'm competetive.

How's the new 29 inch flat screen TV?

AwESoMe!!!!!!! I called in sick the other day to play PS2 the whole day! I didn't even notice that my shift ended!

Is it true that you were dating while with someone?

NO. Hell no. I am just born well mixed thats all. People always think that I'm associated with the next hot guy in the corner but honestly.. they are just really fond of a hot geek like me. Hahahahaha. No kidding.

Your reaction when people say that you are mistreating your reps?

I have never in my entire life mistreated a person. Sure, I'm a bully at times but it comes with boundaries. I don't go overboard with people that I think are very sensitive. I guess I'm just really a straight forward person with no bull.. and a cutthroat at all times.. and people always misunderstood me.

Your plans on settling down?

Yeah.. the hot fiance and I have plans but not in the next 2 years. The plan is to get married in the US and start a family there. I'm not sure if I'll ever get a grand wedding ceremony. The idea gives me goosebumps from time to time.

*an excerpt from the interview that I gave in the local newspaper. Guess what that is...

Usapang Lasing

C: Eh baket ba gumagawa pa ng movies yan si M.Night Shymalan eh sobrang boring naman ng mga movies nya.. except for Sixth Sense I guess.. medyo ok yun.
DQ: Ano ka ba.. sa lahat kaya ng ginawa nyang movies.. Sixth Sense ang may pinakamababaw na substance. Click lang yun film kasi nakakatakot..
C: Weh.. substance substance ka pa dyan..ambaduy baduy nga ng Lady in the Water eh..
DQ: Engot! Palibhasa kasi hindi ka marunong magbasa ng metaphors eh.. asteg kaya yun.
C: Lul.. wag ka nga pa deep..
B: O sige nga.. kung magaling ka sa metaphor.. anong metaphor ang sini symbolize ng mga aliens ni Shymalan sa THE SIGNS?? Sige nga??!
DQ: Something strange and unfamiliar in our lives that we refused to connect with.. yung mga bagay na hindi natin kayang tanggapin dahil hindi natin kayang ipaliwanag.. yung mga pagkakataon na kinatatakutan nating harapin pero hinaharap pa rin ng buong tapang kahit na hindi natin alam kung anong....
C: Weeeeeeeeeeh.. wag ka na. Nag iimbento ka na naman eh.. Eh yung mga multo sa THE SIXTH SENSE.. anong metaphor nun..sige nga kung mahusay ka..
DQ: Taena nyo.. niloloko nyo ba ko?
B: Di ah.. galing mo nga eh. Naiisip ko tuloy kung meron talagang mga natatagong metaphors sa mga movies na napapanood ko.. katulad ng...(matagal na katahimikan)...
DQ: Ng ano???
C: Alvin and the Chipmunks...
B: HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHA... alam ko pwre.. alam ko metaphor nun.
C: HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHA.. yung mga chipmunks ba yung sumisimbolo sa isang pulutong ng mga makukulit na unano??
B and C: HAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAH.. Nice one, pare. Ang galing mo!!
C: Pero hindi hindi tsong.. yung mga chipmunks yung sumisimbolo nung mga babaeng boses pekpek pero adorable naman.. kaya lang clingy saka nakakainis na minsan yung pagka sweet. Hassle mga yun...
B: Ang galing mo tsong! Anong hiwaga ba ang meron sa San Mig Light at talagang napapaisip tayo ng ganito kalupit? Akalain mong nabigyan mo ng metaphor sina Alvin, Simon at Theodore?? Angas ka!!
DQ: Putangina nyo!! Kayo magbayad ng beer nyo.. letse!
C: Hey teka, pretty! Meron pa kaming naisip.. bibigyan daw ni B ng metaphor yung Shark's Tale! saka Finding Nemo.. bibigyan namin ng metaphor si Nemo!! Wui.. wag kang umalis!!
DQ; Taena nyo.. ang tatanda nyo na nanunuod pa rin kayo ng pambatang flicks. Letse aalis na ko.
B: Si Dora.. anong palagay mo kay Dora?
C: Tsong Teodora ba ang totoong pangalan ni Dora?
B: Huh? bakit Teodora??
C: Kasi yung opening.. Tsu.. Tsu.. Tsu.. Tsu.. Tsu--doraaaa.. yung opening nung jingle song sa umpisa..
B: Di ko alam eh.. pero ano bang klaseng unggoy si Boots? Bakit mas maputi pa sya kay Dora??

And so on.. an so forth.. haaaaaaaaay...

I have so many things in my head today.. I guess things will be like this for the next couple of days until I'm done with the interview. I am again.. wanting to land a job that I feel like I'm not going to get but I'll take the risk anyways so that I won't wake up anytime soon and wonder what could have been.. if you know what I mean.

Plus.. i think I hurt someone. You know all that things you do for someone and that someone interprets it as something else. Yeah. all that hassles. Worst thing is..I HAVE TO EXPLAIN. And its not even my interview yet.

Oh God.. I hope its a good week ahead.

Please.

Hindi ako naniniwala sa kulam, barang at iba pang mga bagay na hindi maipaliwanag ng siyensya... hanggang sa magising ako isang araw at mapansin sa salamin na nginitian ako ng isa kong tighiyawat. Taenang mga tigyawat to.. parang may sariling utak. Para lang sila yung mga bibong kamatis sa ATTACK OF THE KILLER TOMATOES. Nagsasalita.. nagbibigay ng opinyon.. nagrereklamo sa tuwing pinapansin ng mga taong mahilig mamintas. At higit sa lahat.. pumipila sa isang kakaibang formation. Nung isang linggo lang nakasalansan sila sa aking kaliwang pisngi at bumuo ng letrang J. At nang matapos sila sa kabilang pisngi ay lumipat sila sa kanan at pumila na parang number 7 lang. Sinasabi ko sa inyo... may utak yung mga pimples ko.

Wala sa lahi namin ang pimpulin. Hindi rin ako tinighiyawat nung teenager pa ko.. hindi kahit kelan. Ngayon lang. Sana ay binalaan man lang ako ng aking lolo na kapag tinighiyawat pala ang isa sa mga lahi namin ay talaga namang malala. Grabe. Agaw pansin. Muntik ko ngang sampalin yung isang kaibigan ko na seryosong nagtanong kung kagagaling ko lang daw sa bulutong. Wala na lang akong nagawa kundi halos mapaiyak at ipagdasal na sana ay maging isang pesteng kurikong sya sa kanyang next life.

Sino ba naman ang hindi maco conscious kapag tinubuan ka ng pimple na parang puputok sa tuwing magtataas ka ng boses? Halos isang buwan din akong nanalangin na sana ay huwag kong makita ang crush ko sa hallway dahil baka bigla na lang akong gumawa ng eksena at pumutok lahat ng pimples ko sa sobrang kilig. Ilang araw na akong naglalakad ng nakayuko. Ngayon alam ko na kung anong feeling nung mga babaeng nasa commercial at nagsasabing.. "Oh no! Ang laki ng pimple kooooooooooo..."

Lahat na nasubukan ko.. pero ang sabi ng dakila kong dermatologist ay dala lang daw sa stress ang pimple break out ko. Subukan ko raw mag isip ng mga bagay na relaxing at huwag daw akong gagamit ng press powder na nagsu suppress ng oil sa mukha. Nata trap daw kasi yung oil at nagiging pimple.

Eh puta... kelan pa kaya mawawala to?

Hindi kaya.. nagsisimula na??? Baka isa itong pangitain...

Sa aking isang malupit na transformation....

TAENA.... AYOKONG MAGING PIMPOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

been real tired...

hope its a great weekend ahead. Damn.

Earn Some.. You deserve it.

Seriously.. as in seriously.. I think they pay on time. You can try joining and refer friends... Here's the LINK:

ClixSense.com.Inc

Happy making money, friends!

absorbing all the drama.

I was watching WILD THINGS last Sunday night. Yep, the Denise Richard - Neve Campbell - Matt Dillon thing. I was staring at the screen for the longest period of time and I bet my mum's ass, you'll laugh out loud and prolly tease me with.. "Huuuuuuuy.. ang manyak mo naman! Titig na titig ka ah!" But in the middle of the dirty steamy hot scene, I felt a lump in my throat and started crying. No reason. I just cried. I realized I was staring at the monitor for the longest time but my mind is really somewhere else.

I'm sure.. at any given time.. I was not the only one feeling that way. I don't know.. Nostalgic, maybe?

Here's the thing with me I remember every happy moments in my life vividly. With someone. With some friends in the past and then I'll start feeling sad. Yeah, you can call that nostalgia. But don't make me wrong, I'm not hung up with these memories or with the someone else's.. because looking back, I can never really trade my place in my life right now. But there are times when you just want to go back there and stay in the moment for a while. I hope I'm not being weird.. but that's just me.

It was a particular moment in my life that flooded me last Sunday night. I was young, carefree and streaming with great dreams. Its the time of someone's life where you feel that you can be who you want to be. A rockstar. A model. A flight attendant. A photographer. A broadway actress. A famous writer. Its the time of someone's life where you feel that the world is yours for the taking and that everything is easy and simple. You are young. You hear that all the time. You have so many things ahead of you...

I was in love. He asked me to get married and live somewhere out of reach. I was 22 years old. He was 27. He gave me a choice.. and very little time. I was kissing him in the rain and people were all around us.. that night but I never really cared. It was drizzling.. my world stopped.

I said NO that night. Because its unfair for everyone involved. Most of all, its unfair for me. I am just starting to see the world, he had seen almost everything. I need a chance to grow up emotionally.. alone. As much as I want to say YES because I can't really imagine myself letting him go.. I stayed for the rightest reasons. Its not worth taking that shot because I know that If I did, I will end up losing every person who loves me yet I get to keep him.

You get to keep the person you love but lose all the others who love you and see you differently. Thats just not a way to love.. or to live. Thats not love.. Its something else.

He got married after a year. I was broken hearted. Just broken hearted. Not shattered. Because sometimes you need to sacrifice your heart in order to understand life's reasons. You have to let go to know the importance of healing. You need to let down your guard to understand self worth. Sometimes.. you have to do it.

I remembered that and I cried. Because I remembered at that very moment before I entered the door.. I said goodbye and I love you..

And I have never felt so alive in my life...

because right at that very moment.. I was in two places at once.

Leaving and loving him.. all at the same time.