* love letter 101 *

This is pretty neat. I was deleting mails in my ems and came across this.

Hi.

I couldn't tell you what I wanted to say last Friday. The place and time was an issue. The walls have ears, the air has eyes. What I wanted to tell you was for your ears only but because things did not turn out the way I wanted it to be, I decided to transform my thoughts into the pixels that make-up this email. May this letter convey what what my voice could not. BTW, this letter is for your eyes only. I don't want anyone else from the ---- reading this, just in case you happen to open this on one of our terminals.

Seeing you makes me happy. Maybe it's the eyes behind the spectacles, for you used to wear glasses back then, your hairstyle at the time, and the way you dress, your love for games and anime, and your perky personality. All those factors worked in concert to sow chaos in my soul, the seed of inspiration. And so it progressed, I was not content with just a sight of you, I yearned to do something, to make you happy as you make me. Remember when I let you borrow my animes? I love doing favors for you because I like you a lot.

One day you asked me to look for that Final Fantasy X-2 Yuna Necklace. It wasn't to hard to find. This page, http://shop.himeya.com/products/etc_ff/ff10_2_yuna/ff10_2_yuna.html, is at the top of the Google search list. I seized the opportunity when you said that you wouldn't want to buy something that expensive. Sure there are cheaper versions of the item but they are silver plated versions, they wouldn't last long. I believe that you deserve only the best. So, armed with my credit card, and cash (I don't want a horrendous bill on my credit card so I had to pay it immediately), I ordered the item, had it shipped to the USA (Himeya doesn't ship to the Philippines, boohoo) and then have my acquantance ship the item here.

I was planning to give it to you on Christmas day but things were such that I could not afford the delay any longer.

It all started when you moved to your new place, near -----. One of the them, ---- noticed the improvement in my work and thought that the change was attributed to you. It was partly my fault. When they asked why I was doing more emails than they did, which is of course expected because their group does nothing all day except surf, gawk at the girls, talk shit, and do maybe... 20 or less emails, my answer was, 'I am inspired.' Now ----- is really good at reading a persons movement... his guess was correct of course. I loathe that day. My wish was to keep my thoughts secret until Christmas Day.

Maybe I was paranoid. I started to avoid you and ignore you when were in the operations area, reverting to my friendly side only when we get to meet outside. I had this feeling that you resent me, that you were trying to make me feel sad, annoyed.. jealous? So I said, 'I can't take this any longer, this has to end.' And there is no better way to end it than giving you the necklace.


October 15 came. I gave the necklace to you as a way of thanking you, to express my feelings, and as a way of ending them. I was wrong.

I heard from a friend that you shed tears when you got the necklace. Is this true? I was not expecting that reaction. I thought that the necklace would make you smile, but tears? I hope it's not affecting your work. The flame within was not extinguished. I still feel for you...

But I have to face reality. The most that I can hope for is to be your friend.


If there's anything you need, don't be afraid to ask, lalo na pag anime ang pag-uusapan. Wag kang mag-alala. Makukuha mo ang last 2 disks ng Greed Island final this week. Hininhintay mo pala ang installments, hindi mo sinasabi, nalaman ko na lang noong kinausap kita noong Friday. Bakit hindi mo sinasabi na kailangan mo pala ang huling installments!?! Hindi mo pa ata napapanood eh.


- Tidus -